9 Romantic Movies That Taught Me Nothing About Love — and 3 I’ll Defend Forever ArticlePure

‘Cinderella’

Let’s start from the beginning. Fairy tales, in general, have lost their luster over the years as women have realized hinging your entire identity on the prospect of a man coming to save you is simply not a sustainable way of life. And while it’s a sweet bedtime story with some great songs, Cinderella really set many of us up for disappointment; we still have to do the laundry even after meeting Prince Charming.

‘Titanic’

What I learned: Just because you’ve changed someone’s entire outlook on life does not mean they’re going to scoot over and create room for you so you don’t freeze to death in the middle of the Atlantic ocean.

And no, I don’t think Jack (Leonardo DiCaprio) would have fit on the door, but Rose (Kate Winslet) didn’t even try to come up with a solution to save him.

‘Love and Basketball’

Growing up is realizing that Quincy (Omar Epps) did not like Monica (Sanaa Lathan). And if he didn’t support her college basketball career, the thought of him morphing into an understanding husband who then supported her flourishing WNBA career just seems implausible to me.

Still, Love and Basketball remains a good watch, and I can never get over that heart-wrenching spring dance scene of Q and Monica looking and pining for each other while dancing with separate dates.

‘Sex and the City’

And speaking of male characters who clearly did not like their partners, how many times and in how many ways did Mr. Big (Chris Noth) have to show Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker) that he wasn’t into her? The man literally bailed on their wedding day, but we were somehow meant to believe that getting married at City Hall placated his commitmentphobia.

‘Two Can Play That Game’

Nowadays, I watch this film because Morris Chestnut and Vivica A. Fox’s performances in it were just too good. However, the idea of “training” your partner and implementing rules to get them to act right is so mind boggling. Whatever happened to good ol’ communication?

‘Think Like a Man’

The title alone lets me know I’m way beyond my depths. Based on the Steve Harvey novel of the same name, Think Like a Man follows a group of women who get a hold of Harvey’s novel and start to apply all these tips and tricks to get their men to act how they want. With an all-star cast featuring Regina Hall, Kevin Hart, Gabrielle Union, Meagan Good, Taraji P. Henson, Michael Ealy, and more … I really watch this for the laughs, not the lesson.

‘Clueless’

TikTok has recently been clocking the ick factor from the fact that Cher (played by Alicia Silverstone) falls in love with her former stepbrother … and he’s a college student to her 15-year-old high school sophomore. But somehow, Paul Rudd’s boyish good looks still sell us on this potentially problematic romance.

‘John Tucker Must Die’

Every time I watch this, I can’t help but wonder: If they all knew John Tucker (Jesse Metcalfe) was a player, dated him anyway, and then sought out to punish him for living in his truth, were the four leads (Ashanti, Sophia Bush, Brittany Snow and Arielle Kebbel) not bullies, then?

‘My Best Friend’s Wedding’

Making us all side-eye our boyfriends’ female friends was this 1997 classic in which Julia Roberts plays Jules — a woman determined to ruin her male best friend’s (Michael, played by Dermot Mulroney) wedding because of a pact they made when they were teenagers.

Between the ploy to get Michael jealous, shade towards Kimmy (Cameron Diaz) and of course, that email which crossed all sorts of boundaries, I’m no expert, but the social media reviewers of today would be so quick to call Jules a narcissist if the film were released today. I would have to agree.

I Stand By: ‘The Way We Were’

This gut-wrenching gem from 1973 has never failed to make me cry. Mostly because it’s so emblematic of how a lot of real-life love stories I know end. Sometimes, you can wholeheartedly love a person, but if your value systems don’t align, it can never work.

And while I would personally take out the Hubbell affair out of the plot line — because I think their differences were strong enough to cause the break up — I can judge this film within the context of its time and say it deserved all six Academy Award nominations it got.

I Stand By: ‘Brokeback Mountain’

I watched Brokeback Mountain once back in 2015 and vowed never to watch it again. It’s too devastating. Much like The Way We Were, it spoke to the real-life issues that can tear relationships apart — including the role societal pressures and expectations play in who we end up with. That’s all changing, of course, but seeing Ennis (Heath Ledger) weep for Jack (Jake Gyllenhaal) in that last scene makes this an easy pick — assuming your heart can handle the rewatch.

I Stand By: ‘Waiting to Exhale’

It’s cheesy to say, but the older I get, the more I realize the bond with your friends is just as important to fortify as the one with your romantic partner, and this female-centric drama starring Whitney Houston, Angela Bassett, Loretta Divine and Lela Rochon exemplifies that perfectly.